First off, I’d like to applaud Pete and Melissa for once again orchestrating a memorable, unpredictable and exciting relocation experience. Knowing that you will be physically, intellectually and emotionally challenged on the job really makes all the difference to those of us who have dedicated our lives (or one summer in college, as the case may be) to the professional moving and storage industry.

I have to admit, however, that I had my doubts as to whether it was possible to top the 2007 Arlington-townhouse-to-fifth-floor-NYC-apartment-plus-three-storage-units-in-two-states transfer. But I should have known better. The Thomsons really know how to bring it when it comes to moving.

Indeed, careful assessment of wide-ranging details allowed Pete and Melissa to design a relocation steeplechase the likes of which few movers have encountered before. With surprises around every corner (was that good Samaritan who jump-started the rented Budget truck a man or a woman?), the weekend was full of action.

Based on their model, here’s a quick guide to building your own relocation steeplechase at home:

1. Obtain an extremely tiny apartment on the top floor of a walk-up building in the most densely populated city in your home country.

2. Spend a year filling that extremely tiny apartment with stuff.

3. At the end of the year, lease a new apartment in another building, taking special care to ensure that the two leases do not overlap–even for a minute.

4. Rent a double-axle moving truck that is too tall for most underpasses and, it turns out, illegal for most city streets according to the polite-but-stern law enforcement officials.

5. Double park said truck on the street in front of your old apartment, taking care to seal off an open parking space against the curb which will taunt and tempt all passers-by for hours.

6. At the suggestion of your out-of-town moving consultant, turn on the emergency blinkers in your rented truck as early in the day as possible and leave them on.*

7. Begin filling the truck with boxes and furniture from the fifth-floor apartment.

8. If you are the out-of-town moving consultant, pause to take a nap in the bed of the truck midway through the afternoon while the leasee continues working. For your safety, make sure to awkwardly wrap your leg around a futon support to avoid falling out of the truck while you slumber. Under no circumstances should you start the truck to recharge the quickly-dissipating battery.*

9. After dark, attempt to move the truck and locate an illegal parking space for your illegal truck.

10. Fail due to battery failure.

11. Use the blocked parking spot as a bargaining chip to convince an SUV driver to jump-start your rental truck.

12. Locate a restaurant maître d’ on a smoke break to help you find a parking spot for your large truck. Celebrate the fact that, most likely, you will not have to spend the night guarding the truck alongside the Jersey Turnpike.

13. Illegally sleep on the floor of the now nearly empty apartment with the plan to get up early to avoid a surprise encounter with the painters who are due at some unknown (but assumed ungodly) hour the following morning.

14. Arise a bit later than hoped. Pass the painters on the stairs in the morning as you carry your mattresses down to the truck. Hope it is still there and hasn’t been towed.

15. Relish in victory when the truck is still in its parking space.

16. Quickly realize you still have to empty the truck.

17. Maneuver the truck to the new apartment, working around aggressive big-city street cleaning schedule and law enforcement policies.

18. Bargain with the UPS man to take over his illegal parking spot in front of a fire hydrant.

19. Carry stuff up to the new apartment. Make sure to mark your territory by leaving a body-sized sweat and dirt stain on the clear glass door to the new apartment building.

20. Start the countdown until the next move: now 360 days and counting.

*[Editor's note: In fairness to our consultant and guest contributor: I don't recall whose idea it was to turn on the blinkers, but Mark definitely noted that we should run the engine periodically during the day to compensate for battery drain--a suggestion I take sole responsibility for ignoring. -PT]

There is a gallery of some of Mark’s moving highlights linked to the thumbnail.

They have trouble staying in line

Now they’ve got it!

Goodbye, ducklings!

We’re taking a summer break from the tinyness of the fun house. But we’ll have a big update soon.

The storms disrupted Metrorail service during the afternoon rush. By 4:25 p.m., Metro had halted service on the Orange Line between East Falls Church and stations west to Vienna because of branches on the tracks, spokeswoman Candace Smith said. Shuttle buses took passengers from East Falls Church to those stations. Passengers heading downtown from Vienna had to take shuttle buses at West Falls Church, Smith said. Normal light-rail service resumed at 6:27 p.m.

–Washington Post

Let me tell you from personal experience, not a whole lot of shuttle buses running between East and West Falls Church. More like hundreds of people standing around in the rain until the trains started running again around 6:30. (or 6:27, apparently)

We’re back from Jamaica! We didn’t really stay in this hut. Here are my photos from Jamaica on Flickr. Melissa will upload hers on the morrow. We don’t have many from the ceremony itself (I was a bit too involved and Melissa was probably a bit too nervous), but Melissa will have some shots from after the ceremony.

UPDATE: Here are two short-ish video clips from our trip:
Melissa jumping off the Tensing Pen bridge
Returning from snorkeling before the ceremony

UPDATE 2: I’ve fixed my Flickr photo set; I had not set permissions properly. Also, note that in the right-hand corner of the Flickr page, there is a slide show option.

UPDATE 3: And now I’ve added more to my Flickr set.

A: The old desk forms the back of the…

B: …Tower of Power. In the diagram, this is the footprint of its pedestal, from which it rises to majestic heights.

C: The Barricade, which hems in and gives some potential support to…*

D: …the Lethal Jenga.

E: Bookcase of camping gear and miscellany.

F: The long table, which has boxes underneath, and was intended to provide a sliding hole for boxes that could be pushed past the [Tower o' Power]. The table, despite its depiction here, is also underneath…

G: …the Tiny Tower. Our DVD tower, which offers a small perch for items.

H: Various book boxes and decorations, hemmed in by the towers.

I: The Floatilla. An upside-down Target light lounge chair lifts light but large boxes to the chicken-wire ceiling.

J: The soft fill that cushions the Jenga.

K: Light, sideways boxes, wedged behind the [Tower o' Power]

L: More boxes.

M: Bed parts!

N: File cab[inets], stacked atop one another

*Its [crown?] also provides some space for the final runs.

And what’s the Letha Jenga, you may ask? Here’s a sketch based on my recollection of building it. I nearly accidentally uncovered it during my quest for boots a couple weeks ago; to do so could have tragic consequences (it’s a stack of precariously stacked dining room chairs, held upright only by the items around it.)

Plus–though I note this with some heartache–my beloved longtime laptop was declared a lost cause at the repair shop. In the intervening weeks since it first broke down, I’ve been limping along by using the Tiny Fun Server, which normally spends its time helping me frustrate Melissa through file and print sharing (it’s back on the job). But I picked up some fresh hardware last weekend, and I’m ready to post.

I’m working on a longer post about the units, complete with maps and diagrams, as well as a fun off-line TFH activity for the kids.

I intended to explain a bit about what goes on here in Reston, but now that I think about it, it really isn’t all that exciting outside of the office. I spend very little time at the house I sleep in, as I don’t have anything in “my” room beyond a bed, a dresser and a bedside table. So if I want to sit, all I’ve got is my desk at work and my car (which stays in Reston for convenience). Other than the office, then, I try to spend as much time as I can with local compatriots (who make up about half of our theoretical readership). Last time I was in town, I joined reader Mark (not “aka me/dad”) for a game at the Nationals’ new stadium (maybe there’s hope.)

Later in the week, while I was supposed to be digging through storage to find warm camping accessories for my wife, I had a burger and fries with possible reader Scott. Tonight, I’m going to watch some pre-recorded reality T.V. with friends. The Annex is what you make of it.